And you know, we were laughing and joking. The hardest thing I have ever done | Health | The Guardian And I couldn't escape the feeling that I was being selfish. During the examination, sonographers need to keep the screen in a position that gives them a good view of your baby. The doctor gave her consent, and I took the four little tablets. I know it is still early days. Last updated July 2017. Some hospitals do offer earlier anomaly scans of the baby, but they will not show as much detail as scans performed between 18 and 20weeks. I had an appointment with my consultant 2 days later, and again he said, you know, 'Very common - shouldn't worry about it too much, you know, if, the problem is if they find anything else wrong'. As I lay down, and the sonographer started, I could see there was something wrong. And I am slowly coming to terms with what has happened. It would be a personal tragedy for my partner and me, but that is all. There was complete silence during the scan. To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account. He suggested he perform an amniocentesis immediately, to rule out any chromosomal problems. And thank God I did. You can change your cookie settings at any time. . . 17/12/2020 17:13. Health professionals use the 18-20 week scan to examine the baby's size and position, and also to check if his/her brain, heart, lungs and other internal organs are developing as expected. I loved him instantly and didn't want to let him go. Try to relax and take it easy. Sometimes women were told that the sonographer had found a 'marker' or sign of a chromosomal condition and had to wait for an amniocentesis to confirm the findings. For many other women, the 18-20 week scan was the point at which they discovered the baby had serious problems. But it is a soft marker for Edwards' syndrome. I know its hard- but i really wouldnt worry about it too much as the worry will stress you and your body out. We didn't feel we could tell anyone what was happening. For example, the babys brain, kidneys, internal organs or bones may not have developed properly. We talked all night and thanked God for crap television. After that I got, I, it was about in, in 19-, hang on a minute, 2001 I got pregnant again, slightly unexpectedly. He felt strong and fit and healthy. I think it's the same - in fact I think it was probably the same room, same consultant - and [sighs] I suppose it felt upsetting because at the dating scan you're full of hope and this scan we knew wasn't going to be good, we knew it was maybe the last time we would see the baby moving around. As I say, I'm not a very nice person at the moment. My partner watched the baby come out, and for a split second I saw a look of joy on his face. There is always a chance that a baby may be born with a health issue that scans could not have identified. Some people we talked to had not had a 18-20-week scan, either because their babies' abnormalities had been detected by earlier . A company limited by guarantee registered in England and Wales company number 3266897. It was a bit worrying but on the plus side I got an extra couple of scans and an extra couple of pictures. We had so much power, we could decide that this little thing should die. I have horrible thoughts. Where we have identified any third party copyright information you will need to obtain permission from the copyright holders concerned. Bad news at 20 week scan, please help. | Mumsnet And shortly after that, that scan we'd finished and the consultant leant back and said, 'I'm afraid we have some problems here'. Later, I did see and hold our baby. It can be such a shock so do whatever you need to feel better. I can feel my child kick, it responds when he shouts at football - I mean literally, this baby used to dance around whenever he'd like scream at a goal - and there cannot be anything wrong with this child because it's part of us already. And, it does not occur to you in the slightest. As I lay down, and the sonographer started, I could see there was something wrong. We saw the consultant, who was reassuring, saying that he would rescan me and was sure everything would be fine. I was wondering if anyone has been is this situation and can give me a glimmer of hope. Many people were deeply affected by their experiences of the 20-week and subsequent specialist scans. I hadn't thought about the mechanics of such a late termination, but had assumed it would mean some kind of operation. My partner really wanted me to, and by that time I had no sense of what was right or what I should do. Apologise for somehow doubting their right to be in this world. I was becoming numb to the whole process. I give pregnant women dirty looks. But it's bloody hard being miserable the whole time. When I told him what had happened, he refused to believe anything was wrong and said he'd sort it out when he came home. Being generous and kind generally happens only when you're happy. I didn't want to be convincing him to agree with me. He felt doing more blood tests would only cause me more discomfort and false hope. This publication is licensed under the terms of the Open Government Licence v3.0 except where otherwise stated. I had a horrible feeling of relief. Never being able to look after himself. Nights were impossible. BabyCenter. And it's like, I really wanted to see it and I didn't, and it was it was very mixed. I know I could have delivered him in a quarter of the time, but I couldn't bear the thought of him leaving me. I had no issues at my 20wk scan with DD - and neither did any of my antenatal group (9 mums). The following is a quote from their report: If the scan reveals either a suspected or confirmed abnormality, the woman should be informed by the sonographer at the time of the scan. Saturday came. I'm trying to understand because I haven't seen a 3-D scan, what it tells the parents? She brought up a picture of the heart on the screen. As soon as we arrived, we were shown to this little room. So we decided to book an early 10 week private scan. I couldn't bear to see the baby and asked the midwife to take him away immediately. Like many things, the theory is very different from the reality. If one of the conditions is found or suspected, the sonographer may ask for a second opinion from another member of staff. Tissue paper will be tucked around your clothing to protect it from the ultrasound gel, which will then be put on your tummy. This short video explains screening for 11 physical conditions in pregnancy. No one else felt him kick. Please note that the opinions expressed by users in Tommys Book of #misCOURAGE are solely those of the user, who is unlikely to have had medical training. It felt like a lifetime to reach our 12-week-scan. Well send you a link to a feedback form. You might be offered another test to find out for certain if your baby has one of the conditions. And so this one can't tell you anything, it's pictures, you're going, you're going to see your baby, you're going to get pictures. Trying to carry on as normal, working and putting on a brave face. The midwife was on the verge of tears and I felt responsible. And then I can't remember an awful lot more about that scan apart from that feeling of searching of how to react in an unknown situation - your brain's kind of trying to work out what to say, what to do, but I had no idea what to say or what to do and I think my first thought was, does that mean our first daughter's okay? Went off for the 20-week scan, which you didn't, you weren't there, were you, for the first scan? But with time although we will never forget, I know we will be ok again. And I know I can't hurry up the process of grieving. But my brain had been given a train of thought that was impossible to stop. I remember thinking, 'Gosh' I now know it was a girl, I didn't know that then, that, 'She looks just like her brother'. So we left it there, and we didn't actually think that there was anything really to worry about after that scan. We had to discuss what we wanted to do with the little body after delivery. Many parents were shocked by findings from the 20-week and later scans. And my husband, we never got to sit next to each other in the consulting room, my husband was across the room from me, and I was sat next to the consultant, and we were laughing and joking with him about, you know, the home delivery, and everything was going to be, 'Are you still on for the home delivery?' On the third day, we got a phone call. I did. Some people want to find out if their baby has one of the 11 conditions and some do not. I was saving my child from pain and suffering. But other than that everything was fine. This one cannot show you anything, that's what's inside your mind. We both thought we would like some good to come out of this horrible experience, so wanted to talk to somebody about the possibility of using the body for research purposes. Which she reassured us that she'd be absolutely fine, this was a one-off. What are the chances of bad news at the 20 week scan | Mumsnet To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account. The first words I said were: "If there's anything wrong then it's my fault", I had been working 70, nearly 80 hours the previous weeks and pushed myself hard. I was willing the results to be normal. Looked exactly like our two year old as a baby. (See. And everybody knows and everything is right. Intellectually, I knew this was not the case. I endured 12 hours of medication and in the early hours February 7, 56 days after my first scan (at nearly 18 weeks), I miscarried our babies. It is also sometimes referred to as the mid-pregnancy scan. The consultant had said it wouldn't be like a normal delivery. Laura miscarried her twin babies in February. You know there's always that bit on the bottom of the thing, 'These are diagnostics, do not bring other children,' - blah, blah, blah.. it's not, you know, it's not a family outing kind of thing, but it feels like it. I think what everyone is saying is that most likely outcome is that there are no problems at all. Sam reassured me, but the guilt had hit me along with the feeling that our world was falling apart. And it was just a bit of a shock because it's not really what you want to hear - you don't really expect that. We've got the same battle scars. He looked fine. If this happens, you will be offered one further scan by 23 weeks of pregnancy. I've still had no cramps or bleeding so fingers crossed everything is ok I just couldn't believe I fell down the stairs, I can't remember the last time I ever did that! The nursery I had selected for our two-year-old son; my maternity leave; the bunk beds; the summer holiday suitable for a newborn baby. And as, and as soon as I saw the pictures of the scan, having had two normal pregnancies, even I could see that there was a marked contrast between this pregnancy and the pictures that I'd had previously. Our position in our families has shifted. By my own hand, I had to end the pregnancy. I managed to tell my mum, who said she would come with us to the hospital. That he - I think I was 21 weeks and 3 days, and he was coming up at 19 weeks and 4 days, or something like that. From losing my dad to his battle with cancer, to then having to face another battle with cancer and my mum; thankfully she pulled though. No sort of questions about, 'Do you want to know whether it's a boy or a girl?' And having read, since read my information on Edwards' syndrome, a good 85 per cent have problems with the heart. And I, and, I felt the weight of deciding what to do about it. Nice people shouldn't hear about what we'd done. But even if I was there, I still think I would have wanted to see the detail on the scan. We'd just spent some time away on a, on a summer holiday and come back expecting to have this scan and be told, 'All fine. And they, sort of two of them were looking at the scan machine and then they sort of switched everything off and said, 'Oh, I think we have, might have a problem'. 18-20 week scans provide clinicians with more information than earlier scans because by18 weeks a healthy baby should be larger and better developed. This article was amended on 24 November 2015 to anonymise the writer. We had amnio and then spent a week in absoute anguish waiting for the outcome which was no trisomies. I couldn't really believe what they were saying. Others, including those who had been given leaflets to read about the scan beforehand as well as some who were health professionals, said that they had been nave about the 20-week scan. Picture every packed football staduim up and down the country - all healthy pregnancies and births. Wed like to set additional cookies to understand how you use GOV.UK, remember your settings and improve government services. I had never imagined having an amniocentesis. You're in and out and that was it. At first the closeness came through a sense of guilt. Several women had taken young children with them to the 20-week scan because they expected to see 'nice pictures of the baby'. Surely he couldn't have missed anything else that is so serious x. To view this licence, visit nationalarchives.gov.uk/doc/open-government-licence/version/3 or write to the Information Policy Team, The National Archives, Kew, London TW9 4DU, or email: psi@nationalarchives.gov.uk. No one else attended and we didn't have a service. After the triple test you stop thinking, you stop thinking that anything can go wrong. Some of the other conditions, such as heart defects, are more difficult to see. And then all of a sudden, I was still laughing and we were all very upbeat, and then suddenly, he suddenly said, but I was still, still laughing, and he said to me, 'Oh, there might be a problem, there might be a problem with the, I think this baby has hydrocephalus'. I ran into the bedroom to tell Sam, who was ecstatic. Anyway we went in for the meeting with the consultant on this particular time, and we'd got to, I was 30 weeks pregnant by then. In a small number of cases some very serious conditions are found. You could see her face, and the major aspect that was, that was the indication of what was wrong was the thickening at the back of the neck in this instance, which, when you're looking at a fetus is, you know, sort of half a centimetre thicker or not is completely immaterial to me, and would look like a completely normal neck, but from the point of view of the consultant was severely abnormal. Thick milky discharge at 14 weeks.tmi pic attached. Can you describe the difference between the scan at this later stage in a pregnancy? I couldn't bring myself to push. When he came back, he agreed on a termination. So at 20 weeks I went for my scan with my husband, with my daughter, to get our photographs. 2022. And this baby sort of floated, and occasionally there was a slight movement, but it was very you could almost see that he was really poorly just from looking at the screen. So choroid plexus cysts on their own, no problem, but if there's something else wrong, then that's a problem. This scan takes place between 18 weeks and 20 weeks 6 days of pregnancy and is commonly called the 20-week scan. b>Bad news at 20 week scan. Maybe our son would have overcome his problems, survived his illnesses, led a happy life. Others said they were shocked because all the early diagnostic tests (e.g. In order for the sonographer to get good images of your baby, the scan is carried out in a dimly lit room. She advised I be referred to the EPU to be assessed. I tried to show him the notes and the photos. In this information, the word we refers to the NHS service that provides screening. So carried on with the plans, and, you know, planning for the, another baby to come along and then we went for a 20- week scan which is obviously the big one and very exciting, seeing all the arms and legs and once again everything was going fine, 'Look here's the baby, here's the length of baby'. It was all going wrong and I wanted to get as far away from the hospital as possible. You will be able to discuss this with your midwife or consultant. Within two days I was waiting in my local EPU unit for further tests. And it all seemed so near at hand, you know, 31, 30 weeks, you feel like you're nearly, you're on the home stretch. Instead, I had to raise a glass of water to my mouth, take a swig and swallow the tablet. Bad news at 20 week scan | Mumsnet Impact of the 20-week and later specialist scans I felt sad, but not the complete devastation of the last scan as they had seen a change of some sort. I mean, you just, you're just overwhelmed, it's so much fun. Maybe. We spent the next few weeks in a happy bubble. The same unique expression he had when he saw our two year old born. Some of the conditions that can be seen on the scan will mean the baby may need treatment or surgery after it is born, for example cleft lip. I had to take a tablet there and then, under the supervision of a nurse, to end the pregnancy. The scan will look in detail at your babys bones, heart, brain, spinal cord, face, kidneys and abdomen. But they didn't. I know it sounds odd that you want to hear that it's wrong, but you, you know it's wrong, and you, you want to be reassured either that it's okay or is there something seriously wrong. So we went back the day after Boxing Day, the 27th, and the consultant greeted us, which made my alarm bells go, and she started scanning us and I think her lines were, 'What concerns me about this baby is that they've got a diaphragmatic hernia, which has meant that part of the stomach of the baby was in its chest cavity.'. We went, I went in to the scanning room and they're quite bland facially anyway, whether everything's fine or not they just look at the screen to start off with and do measurements but I very quickly realised that the woman's demeanour wasn't, even for a bland face, was concerning. There are no known risks to your baby or the mother from having an ultrasound scan but it is important that you consider carefully whether or not to have the 20-week scan. Immediately I knew what decision we should take. We walked all the way home. The consultant at the time wasn't really that interested in that imagery. 10/03/2021 16:13, @Cormoransjacket You get extra care and monitoring as appropriate and baby is proactively treated. You will then be asked to raise your top to your chest and lower your skirt or trousers to your hips. Abortion has never raised any moral dilemmas for me and I am an atheist, so there are no religious issues. Could you tell? Why me and not you, you bastard? And I could see, before she even said anything I could see that there was something wrong with the heart. I was another one who did get bad news at the 20 week scan. And so we talked about it euphemistically, never saying the word "research". If you think you may have a medical emergency, call your doctor, midwife or hospital immediately. And they took me into another room. On January 18, my baby was born, at 23 weeks - a little boy. Enough for two weeks after he had been cremated. What would we like to do with the body? I was sat on the sofa working, my son was at nursery and my partner was in the bath. Finally, Monday came and we went back to the hospital. This image shows a baby's face and hands at 20 weeks, and gives you an idea of what you'll be able to see at this scan. This scan takes place between 18 weeks and 20 weeks 6 days of pregnancy and is commonly called the 20-week scan. 15/02/2014 08:02. Can't seem to find info on the Internet. The thing about that which I felt was difficult is that we could tell when being scanned that there was something very seriously wrong. We'll make an appointment with the senior sonographer, the consultant at the local hospital, and she'll do your scan and she'll be able to tell you more things'. Not marginalised into being a victim. At this point it wasn't looking great. And it's, I can't remember exactly what it was now, it's about where the brain is supposed to form. The sonographer will be able to tell you the results of the scan at the time. Some things can be seen more clearly than others. The rarest scenario is that the baby is severely ill and choices will need to be made. I then had to wait in the room along with many other patients for an hour so they could observe me. I was then told yet again bad news. See more information about the 20-week ultrasound scan. Tommys is a registered charity in England and Wales (1060508) and Scotland (SC039280). With my oldest it turns out she has a minor thing that affects 1 in 1000 of the population and wont harm her at all it's just "there" and with my second the issue turned out to be nothing. Instinctively, did it feel right? And nothing prepares you at all. And you could see, where you should have a picture of 4 chambers, you could really see 2. Soon, the doctor came and inserted the tablets that would induce labour. He started to scan me with a cold expression, then told me - Tommy's Smiling at myself and picturing me and Sam becoming parents. I let out an animal scream and [wife] kind of leapt onto me on the bed. But I was struggling mentally with the anguish, grief and endless hospital visits. So on the Monday we went in to see the senior sonographer, I think she was a consultant at the hospital. The anomaly scan, also called the 20 week scan or mid-pregnancy scan, is used to detect pregnancy irregularities significant in diagnosis of any of the following conditions: In most instances no serious issue will be found during the scan and many parents-to be will come away knowing that all is progressing nicely and, perhaps, having found out . Not surprisingly, people aren't quite sure how to deal with me. So I lay on the bed and my partner sat next to me. And that was scanning up from the above the head, then you were coming up through the child's head, so you were seeing the chambers in the brain, sort of it was evident in all four chambers of the brain, then suddenly one chamber was empty. Several women had taken young children with them to the 20-week scan because they expected to see 'nice pictures of the baby'. He bluntly told me, he wasn't interested in whatever was seen before, he was only going to go by what he saw that day. It is also sometimes referred to as the mid-pregnancy scan . For instance a couple who knew their baby was 'on the small size' were told he was fine at the 18-20 week scan, but discovered at 32 weeks that he had microcephaly. Within it are a number of recommendations for the communication of findings from ultrasounds. And also what the prognosis would mean for our two year old: now a very happy child, he would have a completely different childhood with such an ill sibling.

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